I just can’t.
But, it amazes me a little when people say, “Man, Jamie, I don’t know how you do it all.”
It stops me in my tracks a little bit and makes me wonder, “What am I doing that makes people think I get it all done?” Because truthfully, I’m usually just happy when no one is hungry and everyone smells ok.
I really don’t do it all.
I don’t buy new clothes for my little kids, just our big kids. Hand me downs, consignment stores and sales have gotten us by with no problem.
I don’t meal plan, although I really wish I did. It just stresses me out to think I have to actually stick to what I planned. I may plan that night’s meal in the morning, but that’s not an everyday thing. I need to be better about this.
I also don’t clean my house or do laundry every single day. I pick up and straighten up everyday but that’s only because if I didn’t we might break an ankle or lose one of our children in the toys that get drug out of their baskets and cover every square inch of the floor.
I do, however, have this little problem.
I WANT to do it all.
I like the challenge of a full calendar and busy week ahead.
I like being out and about with my kids, going here and there. I think life is all about experiences and I want my kids to have experiences they will always remember.
…even if it is just a lunch date with mommy at Cici’s Pizza.
Truthfully, I just like being with my kids. But I struggle with other thoughts, too.
Just recently, I had this conversation with my mom about helping Jeff with our family income.
Our financial situation is less than great right now. We will get through it, but it’s been tough.
I want to help him.
I want to help us.
I question myself at least once a week about giving up the whole stay at home mom thing and going to work. I hate feeling like I could be doing more, and if I was doing more, we wouldn’t be in such a tough spot. And this is where my problem comes in.
I want to do it all.
As a girl who couldn’t wait to get a job at 15 and then had a full-time job and two part-time jobs right out of college, I like to earn money. I like to work. I wish I could help more to provide for our family.
I told my mom I’d been praying for a while asking for God to show me what I could do to help our family and I still just don’t know.
My mom said, “Did you ever think maybe you’re not getting an answer because you’re doing just what you’re supposed to be doing?”
Well, no, but maybe she’s right.
Maybe I am doing exactly what I’m supposed to be doing….
….even though I’m not doing it all.